I think all true followers of the Lamb go through what Libby, and others, here describe - christian life can be a bit like entering the Grand National and then wondering what those fences are doing in your way.
Many many people go through their lives moving from one church to another, hoping to find that 'essence' they are looking for. That love that comes from the throne of God. That peace that declares that the Kingdom of God is in this place. Sometimes they find it for a while in the church of their choice and then it seems to fade as 'real life' intrudes.
God woos us like an obsessed lover - He is always calling us on and out - we find him in the quiet places - our prayers, our bible reading, our moments of calm on a beach or a mountain for example. We find Him and feed upon Him. And we know that He has found us too.
There is no struggle with God - there is only love and more love. Outside voices can try to spoil that love - demands of the world, peoples' accusations (true or untrue allegations), self doubts, sins and so on all conspire to try to diminish that enjoyment of life with Him.
The answer is to 'Nestle not Wrestle' - He is more than capable of dealing with all our problems - if we let Him. His strength is more than sufficient to cope with all the problems our lives and minds throw at us.
I know this sounds like a pile of religious platitudes but I've raised 7 children as a lone father in a really tough area - I've been through the mill (so to speak) and have found God was 'there' for me even (and especially) when I was not 'there' for Him. I have tasted triumphs and despair and know that through either of those He was always, unchangeably, on my side.